Mommy Issues in a Woman: Core Signs and Reasons (2024)

In this article

Relationships between mothers and daughters are extremely important as they shape the future life and relationships with others of a woman.

Unfortunately, mommy issues occur pretty often and women struggle because of them. It’s vital to cope with the problem to live a fulfilling life. Knowing more about mommy issues will certainly help!

Mommy Issues in a Woman: Core Signs and Reasons (1)

What Are Mommy Issues in a Woman?

The role of the mother in the life of each woman is paramount. It’s the most important thing, especially in early childhood as there is a strong bond between the mother and her child.

In a healthy relationship, a girl gets all the love, attention, and emotional support. She feels protected and considers her mother as a true friend she can always rely on. In this case, a woman grows up as a confident and harmonious personality capable of creating loving and caring relationships with others.

However, not every family manages to nurture such a healthy connection. Mommy issues usually occur in girls and women who had toxic (or, on the contrary, overly-doting) relationships with their mother who was also emotionally unavailable.

As a result, the kid doesn’t get enough love and support and cannot create a strong bond with their mother.

Moreover, the quality of relationships with mothers also shape daughters’ attitude towards romantic intimacy and it equals the level of openness and trust to others.

In addition to the general mother-daughter relationships, you probably heard about two well-known complexes in psychology — Oedipus and Electra.

Oedipus Complex

This one refers to daddy issues in male children. It implies the feeling of competitiveness with their father over their mother’s love, attention, and affection.

Electra Complex

On the contrary, this complex refers to mommy issues in women. It means that female children feel like they compete with their mothers to get love from their fathers.

The complex occurs at the age of 3 to 5 years and can affect the personality of a woman. It also refers to mommy issues and can nurture insecure attachment styles in women which can affect future romantic relationships.

Core Signs of Mother Issuesin a Woman

You Don’t Have Female Friends or Have Just a Few

Women with mommy issues can not trust other women. This is why they usually don’t have female friends at all or have just a few in their circle.

Women with mommy issues usually choose male company and don’t easily let people in their life in general. So, they expect other women to act and treat them like their mother, who neglects, can be jealous, or sabotage their life or relationships with other people.

That’s why women with mother issues are insecure about relationships with other women.

You Have Difficulties Creating Strong Emotional Bonds

First of all, females with mother issues cannot create strong and healthy emotional bonds simply because they don’t know what it is. As they didn’t bond with their mother, they have hard times bonding with other people.

Another reason for the inability to build emotional bonds is the fear of being vulnerable and opening up to other people.

You Have Resentment Towards Men

We have mentioned that the possible sign of mommy issues is the lack of female friends. Along with it, resentment towards men can also be a demonstration of a deep problem. It happens when women in their early childhood observed their mother having troubled relationships with men. Pushing away men serves as protection against potential emotional harm.

You Have Trust Issues

Mother’s love is unconditional. But it’s not always the case. If a girl had to deserve mom’s love and attention in her childhood, most likely, she will have serious trust issues in the future and will doubt the feelings of other people towards her.

Because of the fears and insecurities, females with mommy issues have difficulties making friends and building romantic relationships with men. And as we all know, trust issues are one of the main reasons for couple breakups.

You Avoid Profound Relationships

Women with mommy issues are simply afraid of being hurt again. You are afraid of building long-term committed relationships despite the desire of being loved and happy.

The biggest fear that nothing is going to work out holds these women back from having a romantic connection. Avoiding relationships means avoiding frustration and pain.

You Have Lots of Insecurities

Negative experiences with a mother in early childhood and adolescence can nurture plenty of insecurities in a woman. In case a mother usually criticized her daughter and didn’t get enough attention and care or ignored her, a girl will have insecurities and a lack of self-esteem.

It won’t let a woman build healthy relationships with herself and set her personal boundaries.

You Don’t Know How to Express Emotions

Everything is rooted in our childhood. Healthy relationships in a family are the basis of an emotionally healthy individual. If a woman has never had a chance to be emotionally close with her mother and share her deepest secrets and feelings, she didn’t learn to express her emotions. Usually, these women never reveal what they feel inside.

This characteristic can be unfortunate for females’ relationships with the opposite sex and seriously damage not just her romantic relationship but also affect her relations with close friends.

This emotional unavailability is a coping mechanism that helps a woman not to feel vulnerable.

You Are Being a Tomboy

Being a tomboy is one of the main demonstrations of having mommy issues. The denial of your feminine side enables you to better control your emotions and stay in the safe zone. Taking into account that your mother was your first feminine example, being a tomboy means rejecting the traits that your mom has.

Also, a tomboy will have a hard time building romantic connections. Therefore, it can hinder your way to happiness.

Tips to Deal With Mommy Issues

If you acknowledge having a similar problem and you want to change your life for the better and get over your childhood traumatic experiences, here are some tips that can help you deal with mommy issues.

Get Emotional Support

If you want to break the circle and heal your wounds, it’s important to build a strong support network that will help you deal with them. Don’t be afraid to talk about your feelings with your significant other, close friends, other family members, or a therapist.

It will ensure your solid emotional support and enable you to let go of the situation. Taking into account that inability to express emotions is one of the signs of having mommy issues, you will have to make an effort and learn to share your deepest feelings and grow from them.

Build Awareness of Your Past

To overcome mommy issues, acknowledge your past experiences and situations. You have to build awareness that certain actions or attitudes of your mother towards you were less than you deserve.

Feeling anger and other intense emotions are the direct sign that you recognize the problem. Once you pinpoint the negative behavior towards you, you will be able to get over them and move on with your life.

Start Therapy Sessions

Mommy issues are not as easy as they might seem at first sight. To overcome them, get professional help. The healing path requires your effort and strong guidance.

Getting therapy is a perfect way to connect with an experienced expert and work through the mommy problems. It will be your first step to acknowledging the roots of the problem in your relationships.

By getting professional guidance, you will make quality changes that will positively transform your life. During online sessions, you will have a chance to explore:

  • Your personality
  • Thought and behavioral patterns
  • Childhood traumatic experiences
  • Relationships problems with your mother and other people, etc.

In addition, therapy is a great way to become a better version of yourself. You can also learn toset up boundaries, increase confidence and self-worth. You can address mental problems like anxiety, depression, codependency and develop the ability to build healthy relationships.

Why Online Therapy?

If you never considered therapy because of the high price, online counseling will be a perfect solution for you. Online sessions are an extremely convenient, affordable, and time-efficient way of connecting with experienced therapists who will help you improve your mental and emotional well-being.

Usually, online therapy platforms offer diverse pricing plans that will fit your individual budget needs. Speaking of the convenience, with online sessions, there is no need to commute to the therapist’ office as you can talk to them online via your favorite device.

So you can set up the treatment process according to your individual preferences and needs to make it as comfortable as possible. This is important for boosting your progress and sticking with the treatment plan.

So, in case you are ready to make your first step to a healthier life and relationships, opt for online therapy to feel the difference and start improving your life.

Read our reviews to choose what suits you best!

Final Words

As you can see, mommy issues are a real existing problem that can have a lasting impact on your life. It’s important to understand that overcoming the problem will take time and effort.

However, facing the issue and doing all your best to cope with it will enable you to significantly improve your well-being and live a fulfilling and enjoyable life.

Just stay consistent to see the results and nurture healthy relationships with yourself, inside of your family, and in your life in general.

In this case, going through therapy will make your progress faster and allow you to achieve tangible results under the supervision of a qualified professional. Online sessions are a more affordable and convenient way to connect with therapists. Just give it a try and see how positively your life can change.

Mommy Issues in a Woman: Core Signs and Reasons (2)

Matthew MacDonald
Matthew is an experienced and passionate BIPOC and inclusivity mental health expert. They are also a blogger, speaker, and relationship coach. Matthew helps people practice self-love and find mental and emotional peace through simple, practical tips and resources.

Mommy Issues in a Woman: Core Signs and Reasons (2024)

FAQs

Mommy Issues in a Woman: Core Signs and Reasons? ›

Signs of mommy issues can vary greatly, ranging from withdrawal and isolation from others to extreme clinginess and smothering of others. If you have mommy issues, you can work on repairing those wounds through therapy, practicing self-care, and forming healthy relationships with others.

What are signs of mommy issues? ›

Signs of mommy issues can vary greatly, ranging from withdrawal and isolation from others to extreme clinginess and smothering of others. If you have mommy issues, you can work on repairing those wounds through therapy, practicing self-care, and forming healthy relationships with others.

How do you fix mommy issues? ›

Seeking supportive relationships with others can help you develop self-confidence to overcome mommy issues. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family members who encourage and make you feel your best. Cultivating healthy relationships can go a long way when trying to overcome childhood issues.

What is an example of mothering a man? ›

Other behaviors of mothering a grown man include acting overly helpful by doing things for him that he can do for himself; assuming a man will be absent-minded or forgetful and therefore reminding him of information that he should remember by himself; taking charge of activities that you assume he can't do right; ...

Why do I feel like I don't want to be a mom? ›

Most mothers are exhausted and annoyed at motherhood because their children may cry and whine a lot, not listen, and do dangerous things that they're not aware are anxiety provoking for parents. Motherhood is hard and it's true that many moms hate being a mother. It's ok, you're not alone.

What triggers mommy issues? ›

So-called mommy issues can also result from overprotective or overly permissive mother-child dynamics. Maybe she did all the household chores and looked the other way when you made mistakes. Or perhaps she tried to be your best friend and confidant, not your mother.

What is the root of mommy issues? ›

Mommy issues also have roots in John Bowlby's attachment theory. This theory suggests that babies have an innate need to form a close, emotional bond with their primary caregiver, typically the mother.

How does mommy issues affect a girl? ›

If a female child has mommy issues, it's more typically referencing that a mother nitpicked or verbally put down their daughter. This can lead to self-confidence and self-image issues later in life. It can also lead to trust issues since the person that you trusted for your primary care let you down in this way.

How to treat a girl with mommy issues? ›

Perhaps it is best to sit down and express your concerns. Try telling them that you understand their relationship with their parent but you prefer to do things your way or that you would rather not be compared to the mother. Make them see you for who you are and that you don't always want to be compared to their mom.

What is a dominant mother syndrome? ›

MD. Overbearing mothers hover, criticize, and overstep boundaries, which can lead to a host of challenges for their adult children including low self-esteem, dependence, and perfectionism. These mothers may think they are doing what's best for their children, but ultimately their hovering causes harm.

How do men show mommy issues? ›

He may be exceptionally anxious and clingy toward his partner, or he may be extremely avoidant or dismissive—or he may have a mixed attachment style, sometimes called a disorganized attachment style. A man with mommy issues may struggle to be vulnerable with his romantic partner out of fear of abandonment.

Why would a man call a woman mommy? ›

If a guy calls his girlfriend “Mom” or “Mommy,” it could mean that he is trying to express his love and admiration for her. It could also be a sign of endearment, showing that he considers her to be a motherly figure in his life. It could also be a way of expressing his gratitude for all that she does for him.

What is psychological mothering? ›

A quick definition of psychological mother:

A de facto parent is someone who has taken care of a child for a significant amount of time, even if they are not the legal parent. A psychological parent is someone who provides emotional and physical support to a child on a regular basis.

What is cold mother syndrome? ›

Cold mother syndrome refers to a parenting style characterized by emotional distance, dismissiveness, and rejection. This type of mothering is often accompanied by a lack of emotional availability and neglect of a child's emotional needs.

Why do I feel no connection to my child? ›

Feeling disconnected from your child is a usual part of parenting. Although it leaves you questioning your abilities, with some time and effort, you can work on restoring your connection. Excess screen time, neglecting your own needs, and replacing quality time with material things can contribute to the disconnect.

Why do I feel like my mom doesn't like me anymore? ›

Perhaps the child is feeling neglected or unsupported, and has interpreted this as hatred.” Dragomir says that sometimes, a child comes to think their mom hates them because they "witnessed their mother behaving angrily towards others, and has mistakenly assumed that this anger is directed at them.”

Are mommy issues a red flag? ›

It becomes a red flag if their love interest or crush does not meet his mother's qualities. They will likely lose interest in that person and move on to the next individual who can meet their mother's standards. Doing this puts people under pressure because they try to be like someone else.

How does someone with daddy issues act? ›

You're possessive and clingy

Legitimate daddy issues can result in feeling overly anxious when a partner must go somewhere. If you're constantly worried about being alone, making you act clingy or possessive, you may have an anxious attachment style.

What happens if a girl has daddy issues? ›

In some cases, “a woman will go out into the world seeking the type of love that she didn't get as a child from her father figure,” says Melendez. Lacking a “father protector” during childhood, a woman may look for men to care for her (and dominate her) emotionally and financially. Choosing unfit partners.

Top Articles
Latest Posts
Article information

Author: Nathanial Hackett

Last Updated:

Views: 6699

Rating: 4.1 / 5 (72 voted)

Reviews: 95% of readers found this page helpful

Author information

Name: Nathanial Hackett

Birthday: 1997-10-09

Address: Apt. 935 264 Abshire Canyon, South Nerissachester, NM 01800

Phone: +9752624861224

Job: Forward Technology Assistant

Hobby: Listening to music, Shopping, Vacation, Baton twirling, Flower arranging, Blacksmithing, Do it yourself

Introduction: My name is Nathanial Hackett, I am a lovely, curious, smiling, lively, thoughtful, courageous, lively person who loves writing and wants to share my knowledge and understanding with you.