At the end of 2022, I sat down to plan out my goals and intentions for this year and for the first time ever I decided to create specific mom goals for myself. With my daughter, Toni, getting older (she turned 5 this past October), I jokingly tell my husband we’re no longer just caretakers, we actually have to parent now. With her growing up and the arrival of our baby boy, I’ve felt the Lord leading me to focus more on growing and excelling as a mother. So, this year one of my biggest goals is to be more intentional on how I engage with my babies and care for them.
My mom goals aren’t very deep – they’re just deliberate. There are habits and practices I want to put in place to 1) grow a deeper relationship with my children, 2) meet their physical and emotional needs and 3) train them in their faith/relationship with God. I feel that the goals I’ve put in place will help us do all three.
My 2023 Mom Goals
1 | Spend intentional time with my children every day feeding them emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.
This year I want to spend less time on my phone and in my work, and instead dedicate undistracted time with my babies just cuddling, talking, and being present.
I recently bought Toni this children’s bible and we are loving it. Before bed we read a passage then talk about what we learned and end it with a prayer. Doing this accomplishes 3 things. 1) it helps us connect and talk to each other undistracted; 2) reading together helps encourage Toni to pick up a book and love reading herself; and 3) it sets a foundation for Toni in her walk with God as she learns how to engage with scripture and connect with Him in prayer. Baby Jonathan is too young for an actual devotion time, but I’m still exposing him to our faith and spending time with him by praying over him and reading him stories from a baby Bible.
2 | Take Toni out on mommy and me dates monthly.
Having a monthly “girls’ day” with my daughter gives me the chance to really connect with her and get into her world. This is our chance to continually grow together and bond, which has become especially important since the new baby has come on the scene and taken much of my attention. These mommy and me dates aren’t over the top. Last month we went to the mall for a little shopping and lunch. Next month we’re getting pedicures together.
3 | Teach Toni how to read.
My little lady will be headed to kindergarten this year so it’s about time we start working on this. She has been showing major interest in reading lately and has specifically asked me to teach her how to read. I’m super proud that that is a goal she set for herself and am committed to helping her see it through this year.
4 | Put away at least $1,000 each in the kids’ savings accounts.
When I left home for college I had only $50 in my savings account – and that’s only because that was the minimum deposit required to open the account. My parents did very little to set me up for success financially. I refuse to repeat that cycle. This year the goal is to not only set money aside for my children, but to also start teaching Toni about good money management.
5 | Take time to pour into myself.
Self-care will not be an afterthought this year. My goal is to set aside time to fill my own cup, so I’ll have the energy and capacity to take care of my family. This means taking time for God, physical rest (sleep), recreation, alone time, and connections with friends.
6 | Model healthy communication in front of the children
One thing I have to work on is how I respond to stress and frustration in general, but especially in front of my children. My husband and I try not to let the little ones (really, Toni) know when we’re mad at each other or stressed, but there have definitely been times Toni was privy to conflicts when she should not have been. My pregnancy and postpartum hormonal mood swings also did not help.
I grew up in a household where there was no concept of respectful conflict resolution. Lots of screaming, cursing, and even violence were normal. It affected me deeply – and still does! I don’t want that for my children. While my household environment today is nowhere near that bad, I definitely can do better about staying calm when I get upset. I want to show my children how to have healthy disagreements and still maintain a cool head under duress. I can’t preach the fruit of the spirt to them when I myself am lacking in that area.
Being a good mom isn’t deep; it’s just deliberate.
I encourage you to take time to set some specific goals for yourself and your family. Your mom goals don’t have to look like mine or anyone else’s. What does it look like to you to be successful as a mom? Picture that woman then set a few specific intentions that will help you become her!
